Hooked On A Thielen goes off, takes down Utah Falco, 147-129
Tough luck week for Falco, who would have beaten anyone else this week but HOTA. That's the way the cookie crumbles sometimes though (not the only weird matchup like that this week). HOTA didn't play his namesake (smart move: Thielen got 1 point) but maybe should rename his team involving Nick Chubb and his 38.5 points.
Death Valley Driver topples Pedro Pickles, 117.5-87
DVD didn't seem to care about Mecole Hardman losing a point for him this week. Or that Deshaun Watson laid a stinker. After Davante Adams put up a big week on Thursday night, that's all he really needed. A week after riding Mark Ingram to a huge point total, Ingram disappointed for Pedro Pickles this week. Even Patrick Mahomes "underperformed."
Hardcore Sacks, uh, hardcore sacks Team Provost, 115-109.5
With Wayne Gallman doing his best Saquon imitation, it looked like Provost was going to walk away with this matchup. And then Jared Goff and Cooper Kupp brought Hardcore back, giving him the birthday comeback win. Provost had the bad luck of Marlon Mack getting injured mid-game, or we might be singing a different tune.
Released Dix On Boobies pops Hamilton Rod and Gun, 100-69.5
HRG was by far our highest scoring team going into Week 4, and put up the second lowest score of the week (The Commish apparently felt bad and decided to take that mantle for the week; more on that next). His usual studs just didn't have studly weeks: Keenan Allen had a long TD called back on penalty and Zeke and the Cowboys offense looked like the white stuff that accumulates in the corners of your mouth when you're really thirsty. Boobies (heh) had a solid day from his team, including big ones from Kenny Golladay and James Conner.
Iron Ryan tops Jeff Fisher Effect in pillow fight, 70-67.5
I cannot tell you how hard I was rooting for a tie in this matchup. Honestly, neither of these teams deserved to win this game. Why do I say that? Combine their scores, and they still don't beat HOTA this week. This was just a god awful showing by both teams. JFE's top scorers were his kicker and his defense. NONE of his skill players scored in double digits. I-Ry basically rode his two RBs (fittingly enough) to this victory; they combined for 31.5 of his 70 points. Honestly, these two teams should each think about giving up the season. Wait...Iron Ryan is 3-1?? Sometimes, that's the way the cookie crumbles.
Make Money, Money, Make Money, Monaaaay
Hooked on a Thielen tops the league this week for his second Tidwell of the season. Through 4 weeks, we have only 2 Tidwell winners. Not surprisingly, they are in first and second place.
Interesting Stuff through 4 weeks
So here's some weird/fun/interesting things through the first 4 weeks of the season:
- Who has the most points against on the season? Yeah, that would be Hooked On A Thielen, who's 3-1 (it helps that he's score the second most). Fewest points against? That would be Iron Ryan, also 3-1. We know HRG has scored the most points. The fewest? Your Commish, JFE (who also happens to have the second fewest points against). HRG has the third fewest points against.
- So to summarize: your fewest points against are I-Ry (3-1), JFE (1-3) and HRG (3-1).
- In the last two weeks, DVD is 1-1. He lost in Week 3 by 30.5 points, and then won in Week 4 by 30.5. So he's technically "even" over the last two weeks.
- We've had three separate instances this season where a team has scored 109.5 points. Prior to this year, there were only five total instances of 109.5 points.
Something That Irrationally Excites Me
You guys know I've been tracking stats for the entire history of the league. We currently have two owners sitting at 49 all-time wins: Tim and Kevin. And the part that excites me? THEY PLAY EACH OTHER IN WEEK 5! Winner is the first in STPS history to 50 wins.
And so, I bring back....The KevMeme.
And we're on to Week 5!
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